Friday, 16 March 2007

I'm not trying to show off

Yes, I know it's practically sub-zero temperatures outside at the moment and the environment is less "native woodland" and more "wind tunnel" but, hell, take a look out my bedroom window this morning.

Wednesday, 14 March 2007

Legion of Super-Packers

Apparently I don't know as much about international removals as I thought I did. It seems that the way they do things now is to have one team come in, wrap all your worldly possessions in paper and bubblewrap and then put them all in boxes - the Packers. Then they leave and Team Movers comes in, does an inventory, puts all the stuff in the back of a truck and drives off leaving you with nothing more than a fistful of coloured papers. That is now all we have to account for a houseful of Roo and my stuff; 7 green pieces of paper.

So, the packers turned up and there was a guy in his 40s, a young, overweight kid and a dude who looked as if he earned extra cash at night, boxing shirt and shoeless in underground clubs. I showed them around the house and when I had finished they went about their work without so much as a word exchanged between them. The older guy started filling out paperwork, the larger dude headed to the kitchen to pack the glassware and the buff one strode off towards the sitting room.

I took this to be further customisation of roles. The big boned lad was Joey Safehands, not much power but the lightest touch in the removal game. He specialised in the packaging of delicates and was so good at his job that he'd only lost two tumblers and a chipped mug (that the owners didn’t really like) in the last 18 months. The one looking after the TV and chairs is referred to as The Hulk but never to his face. He can bench press more than four times his own bodyweight and once moved two pianos at the same time. The final member of the team was Tetris. Once a professor of mathematics, Tetris is the most gifted natural tessellatetorian in the southern hemisphere. He takes the boxes from the other two and designs a strategy for packing them into the van that uses dimensions beyond the reach of Newtonian physics. Some say that he goes down to the beach on his days off and rearranges grains of sand for fun.

After a couple of hours they took a break. After a coffee and a couple of pies, The Hulk headed into the kitchen, Tetris remained in the front of the house and Joey moved up to the bedroom. My vision of the greatest packing team ever assembled crumbled and I came to the conclusion that they must have decided who was going to pack what while they were out of earshot getting the paper, boxes and tape out of the van.

Monday, 12 March 2007

“Previously on Reality Splinter…”

So, yes, I’m now in Wellington. For those of you who missed a couple of episodes here’s the short version: Robyn doing PhD at Victoria University (it’s in Wellington, New Zealand not the Australian state just to make it more complicated than it needs to be), me arrived last Friday and continuing with Melbourne job but from here.

And it’s great. Wellington feels like home. Melbourne, for all it’s fine coffee and flying mammals, never did. Also, Robyn is now on her path to becoming a clinical psychologist and I find it wonderful listening to her so full of enthusiasm for her day when we talk in the evening. There were mishaps and stories that fell out of the move but I’ll cover those in later posts. Mainly this entry is to reassure everyone that the move went okay and normal service will shortly resume. Partly, it’s to announce the resumption of a daily posting schedule (if Hagrid can do it from the middle of an African game park surely I can as well) and a little bit of the motivation behind it is to show off and say, “Look at the view from my front door!”