Thursday, 11 January 2007

If it walks like a candle and quacks like a candle

The tram ride home is quite a harrowing experience at the moment. A lot of residents are still on holiday so in theory there should be less people commuting. This means that Connex has put the Melbourne public transport system on reduced services for January. The problem is that my route home starts at the beach, picks up all the holiday makers and then proceeds past my work and into the city. Less trams, plus more travellers, equals me with my face in some guy's armpit for 20 minutes. On top of this we've been having 30+ temperatures for the last couple of weeks so I'm sure you can imagine that the carriages get fairly ripe by 5.30pm.

Yesterday, the tram was packed like a snake in a novelty can of peanuts and I was forced to get up close and personal with my fellow commuters. The doors closed and suddenly it was as if I was in a candle factory. There was an overwhelming smell of wax coming from a guy in a suit next to me. It wasn't particularly unpleasant but not exactly the olfactory sensation I was expecting on a tram in downtown Melbourne.

Try as I might, I could not workout why the perfectly ordinary looking salaryman should be giving off an odour of wax. His ears were clean, I couldn't see any stains on his clothing to suggest he'd knocked over a candelabras' worth of candles and he didn't look like the type to try a new and hip cologne (Waxy for Men by Kalvin Clein).

So here's the interactive part of the show. Let's pull a Voltron and see if anyone has a solution as to why someone would smell like a vat of melted candles. Put your answer on a back of a postcard and post it in the comments section below.

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